Lyndel is a loving, caring and generous therapist who aims to welcome her clients into a warm and calming environment, where they can begin to unravel the pain of their relational journey.
Lyndel begins by assessing your individual reasons for bravely entering the experience of couple’s therapy. She also identifies your therapy goals and your motivation for change as she understands that to make therapy helpful, both parties need to be willing to make changes.
She will help clients explore the reasons or patterns that have evolved, which have kept them stuck or in pain.
Lyndel will understand that while most couples admit that their problem is one of poor communication, that there are many underlying reasons, often stemming into their past lives for these reasons and that these roots also need to be addressed, which also reveal their often unspoken wishes, desires and needs, however, Lyndel understands that such unravelling provides the essence of where each partner needs to grow and change in order for the couple to grow and move towards a deeper sense of love and fulfilment.
Lyndel also knows, however, that change in itself is stressful, so addressing the patterns, which perpetuate the couple’s state of stuckness or disconnection, also creates stress, so she endeavours to slow the therapy process down so that partner can experience what they experience, but have not acknowledged, sometimes even to themselves.
Lyndel’s primary aim is to for creating a safe space to allow emotional safety, renewed trust, respect and differentiation to slowly develop, while also accepting that unless both partners need to be willing to engage in this process. Experiencing and the anxiety and apprehension of the emerging feeling of vulnerability, and learning how to express such feelings, in a soft, tender way, brings hearing, healing and renewed connection, wisdom, maturity, grace and often times humble forgiveness.
However, when both parties are not committed to this process of personal growth and change, Lyndel graciously accepts each partners’ decision, that is one might want out, the other desperate to save the relationship. She accepts that today’s world presents more choices, challenges and problems that ever before and such complexities are not always successfully navigated to each partner’s desires, especially when affairs or infidelities, addictions or issues of coercive control or emotional, verbal or psychological abuse and issues of safety are involve.
So then Lyndel will recommend that one partner move onto a separate individual therapist, while she supports the remaining partner with their individual needs. Her goal then is to assist each partner to accept that there is not always an easy, straightforward answer to their complex problems at that time.
Nevertheless, given today’s complexities, all the more reason why Lyndel is so focussed on assisting couples’ navigate their relational needs through the demands of today’s world if they want a long-term fulfilling relationship.