Narcissism Relationship Counselling

Narcissism Relationship Counselling

Our highly experienced therapists are trained in dealing narcissistic personalities and can help with your relationship issues.

Is Your Partner a Narcissist or Showing Narcissistic Traits?

Is Your Partner a Narcissist or Showing Narcissistic Traits?

Finding a Psychologist who is familiar and experienced with these conditions is important as Narcissism can be notoriously difficult to pick up in a few sessions if the Psychologist is not trained in this. Education on Narcissism is taught in Psychology courses but does not fully explain the widespread occurrence of this condition, and also the full ramifications of this, particularly to the partner.

We at the Hart Centre are committed to ongoing education and training in these areas and in supporting you in managing yourself and your relationships.For more information on Narcissism and narcissistic partners read our blog.

Relationship Counselling When Narcissism is Involved

The success of relationship and marriage counselling depends on many factors, but is largely due to the commitment of both partners to see their patterns and contributions, and be willing to change. Your partner’s ability to do this will depend on his/her level of Narcissism.

You will often not know how willing you and your partner are to do this until you attempt to do so.  You will be able to see for yourselves over 3 to 6 sessions what real effort each of you are putting in to see the problems, own your contributions and make changes.

If, after reading the information here, you feel you are definitely living with a Narcissist, I suggest you come to the first session (or book a Skype session) on your own.

If you feel your first choice is to work on your relationship, then we can then follow this first session with a session with your partner individually, then commence couples sessions with both of you.

The effectiveness of couples counselling depends very much on the level of Narcissism (and the resultant ability to take responsibility for their contribution) of each partner in the couple dynamic. These days the term is used very commonly in the general public so it is important not to jump to conclusions and to seek more information, like in our Narcissism blog.

Often we only find out the true capacity for self reflection and owning our own patterns by going through the process of couples counselling. Of course that will be your decision to make if you feel your relationship deserves this process. You will usually see within 6 sessions how willing your partner  is to take responsibility for his/her contribution and you can make your decisions from there. If he/she is extremely Narcissistic, couples counselling won’t work for this reason. The extreme Narcissist doesn’t see he/she is contributing to the relationship problems in any way.

Relationship Counselling When Narcissism is Involved

Signs That My Partner is a Narcissist

  • Subtle criticism, often passive-aggressive comments and sarcasm
  • Inflated self importance and entitlement
  • Overt or covert need of admiration (the loudest/proudest in the room, or the grumpy self-pitying judgemental person in the corner)
  • Tendencies of bragging, exaggeration of achievements/talents, stories “to good to be true”
  • Not taking responsibility of own wrong doings
  • Over-reaction to criticism and little self-awareness
  • Blaming others for their actions if caught
  • Blame shifting, taking focus away from themselves and back on the person criticising
  • Repeatedly blames you for past wrongs, even if it was many years ago
  • “Gaslights” ie changes the story to make them sound like the good guy and you as the bad guy
  • Taking credit for other’s achievements like it is their own
  • Talks about what they are going to do but seems to never actually do it
  • Can be preoccupied by fantasies of power, achievements, success or beauty
  • An excessive need of praise, puts themselves on a pedestal
  • Idealizes people who have something they don’t and makes this person sound like a super-human
  • Treats people who they see lower than themselves very poorly (ie service staff, teachers, hospitality workers, ex partners)
  • Seems to follow a cycle: Love bombing/idealizing, Devaluating, Discarding(repeat)

Important considerations before attending therapy with a narcissist

  •  Consider attending a few sessions yourself before inviting your partner.
  • Understand that you are not alone, and that sometimes it is difficult to pinpoint exactly what narcissistic abuse looks like for you.
  • If at any point you feel unsafe, don’t be afraid to contact 000 and/or the government helpline 1800RESPECT.

Empowerment Help for individuals in relationships with a Narcissist

Whether or not you are still in a relationship with the person, we can help you understand the situation and empower you, either if you wish to stay together or move on from a narcissistic relationship.

Our Personal Empowerment program involves 12 steps to recovery:

  • Insight and a thorough understanding of the dynamics of what has been happening in your relationships.
  • Uncover and express your feelings and have these feelings and experiences validated by someone who understands what you have been experiencing.
  • Process these emotions and recognise these patterns from past relationships, including your parents, in order to clear them from your subconscious patterns.
  • Discovering your genuine needs and wants as an individual and in a relationship.
  • Be aware of your feelings and manage your emotional self on a daily basis.
  • Learn to build healthy boundaries with others, where you care for but don’t take on emotional responsibility for anyone other than yourself.
  • Rediscover your own intuition and trust it again, rather than your partner’s negative views of you.
  • Encouragement to believe in yourself again and recognise your magnificence.
  • Recognising and managing the desire to go back to the unhealthy Narcissist.
  • Help redesign your life from the inside out, trusting in yourself and who you really are.
  • Find the Gift in this relationship for you. How have you grown in yourself as a result of these experiences?
  • Moving onto a new equal relationship ensuring a healthy love. Narcissist screening test, and learn the ability to recognise the difference between real love and fake or controlling love.

Plan B – if counselling doesn’t work

I also suggest that there is a Plan B in place, so that after an agreed on number of couples sessions, if you feel you are not achieving the changes and results you want, then you continue coming to sessions on your own to look at your options and be supported in doing your own work of rebuilding your Identity, boundaries and possibly new life.

Why is it so difficult to leave a narcissist?

Anyone who has left a relationship with a Narcissist knows that it can be a very challenging process. Here are a few reasons why this kind of breaking up presents extra difficulties over and above leaving an ordinary relationship.

Healing Experiences Shared

Hear from individuals and couples who’ve experienced change through our professional counselling. Their stories reflect the care and support we deliver.

relationship therapy

A.B – Albert Park, SA

Very easy booking process to navigate, website has an excellent layout and very informative with lot’s of information regarding the therapists and the services offered! Thank you

A.B

Albert Park, SA

A.C – Canterbury, VIC

The Hart Centre, namely Nicole made the process very easy, friendly, professional and above all else made the process of ensuring my relationship continue. Which means the world to me. Thank you Hart Centre and thank you Nicole.

A.C

Canterbury, VIC

A.K – Frankston, VIC

The almost immediate response after my enquiry was really comforting in a difficult time! The booking process incredibly easy and the receptionist I had was lovely and compassionate and made me feel like I could have complete trust in the service I was booking! Thank you!

A.K

Frankston, VIC

A.R – Bondi Junction, NSW

The Hart Centre has the most reputable psychologists and I cannot recommend them more highly, no matter what stage of life you’re at. I first went through the Hart Centre 10 years ago and it was positively life changing.

A.R

Bondi Junction, NSW

B.J – Hawthorn, VIC

Alex went above and beyond to facilitate an urgent clinical psychologist for my very fragile son. The team at HART are kind , caring and empathetic and for this, I’ll be forever grateful.

B.J

Hawthorn, VIC

C.A – Joslin SA

Easy booking system and recommended therapist process is intuitive and helpful.

C.A

Joslin SA

C.M – Belair, SA

Paul has a different approach to previous counselors I’ve seen, first I was a little unsure but over time I find the methods used are extremely effective. I am in a much better place. Paul is flexible and has a variety of available times work in with schedules.

C.M

Belair, SA

C.M – Werribee, VIC

Booked my first session. Looking forward to session. The team are lovely and are really helpful and answer all questions.

C.M

Werribee, VIC

C.P – Spring Hill, QLD

Great easy to talk to a very save place to allow yourself to heal and let go and grow.

C.P

Spring Hill, QLD

D.O – Narre Warren, VIC

I was very Comfortable with Terry and her Dog, I felt at ease and the session went really quickly thanks for making it easy on me from Debbie

D.O

Narre Warren, VIC

D.S – Barwon Heads, VIC

Carolyn was brilliant. She was easy to connect with and me feel valued.

D.S

Barwon Heads, VIC

G.D – Leichhardt, NSW

Unbelievably good – caring, helpful, got everything underway immediately.

G.D

Leichhardt, NSW

G.K – Belair, SA

Fantastic service answering all my questions couldn’t rate the service highly enough.

G.K

Belair, SA

J.B – Maroochydore, QLD

Booking process was quick & easy. Customer service call was pleasant & helpful.

J.B

Maroochydore, QLD

J.H – Belair, SA

The receptionist was very professional and the process has been very easy. Communication has been great with the whole staff. Definitely recommend them!

J.H

Belair, SA

KD – Bundall, QLD

Spoke with Hailey, she was really great. I am looking forward to my first session with Kari.

KD

Bundall, QLD

N.C – Brighton East, VIC

Seamless booking process, at a hard time I was looking for a simple, clear and positive platform and this certainly delivered.

N.C

Brighton East, VIC

L.F – Carine, WA

The booking process was fast and seamless! I received an email with their availability within an hour and was able to confirm my booking right away.

L.F

Carine, WA

P.I – Garfield, VIC

Being such a sensitive situation to go through, I found their booking process very easy to use. Their information was very informative and helped me to make my appointment with confidence.

P.I

Garfield, VIC

S.R – Prahran, VIC

Found an amazing contact with the help from the Hart Centre. Terrific platform. Thanks HC team.

S.R

Prahran, VIC

T.E – Stones Corner, QLD

They replied to me quickly and were extremely helpful when I had questions. Highly recommend.

T.E

Stones Corner, QLD

T.H – Deception Bay, QLD

My husband and I recently did a few counselling sessions with William. I have never been to counselling previously and found Williams approach very empathetic whilst holding us to account. We felt very comfortable with William which made the process so much easier to manoeuvre through as it is not always easy to express yourself to a stranger. Would highly recommend William for any counselling.

T.H

Deception Bay, QLD

Tyson - Moonee Ponds, VIC

They do all the hard stuff for you so it’s really not stressful at all they book they make everything so easy

Tyson

Moonee Ponds, VIC

Our expert-vetted therapists from a range of health funds
 Our Session
Lengths

Our Session
Lengths

Duration

Couples Counselling & Marriage counselling sessions are 50 mins

Cost

Ranging from
$150 - $300

First sessions are usually 50 minutes in duration, unless quoted otherwise. We also have Telehealth sessions available. After hours times are also available at select locations. Private Health Insurance Rebates apply, and Medicare Rebates may apply.

Why Choose The Hart Centre?

Our rigorous matching and vetting process means we only connect you with reliable, top-rated therapists.

Unrivaled Matching Process

We understand your needs. We match you with a therapist who fits your schedule, budget, and counselling style.

Expert-Vetted Therapists

We work with the best. Hart Centre therapists undergo rigorous vetting, ongoing training, and client feedback.

Satisfaction Guarantee

We offer a satisfaction guarantee. If the therapist isn't the right fit after the first session, we'll rematch you and cover the next session's cost.
Australia's 
Relationship Experts

Australia's
Relationship Experts

Your relationship matters. For over 20 years, we’ve helped over 83,000 clients as Australia’s leading couples counselling group. With over 230+ Hart Centre Certified therapists, finding yours is easy.